"How is that my problem?"

This really isn’t a story about being married.

It’s more of a story of when you get married, you marry your spouse’s friends.

I consider Bobby’s BFF’s my brothers, and therefore, I relentlessly make fun of them.

Funny thing is that when you are in college, I always took for granted having them around. It felt like the party was never going to end… But because of a complicated algorithm, called “match”, we are literally spread out like points of a star in the Midwest. Unluckily for me, I ended up in the murder capital of the United States, St. Louis, Missouri. Oh what joy. Did you know that Missouri is one of the top 11 most depressing states to live in? Seriously, it was on www.health.com .On that sunny June day when Bobby is done with residency, I will follow the yellow brick road all the way down the best thing that has come out of Missouri, I – 70 west. Until then, I digress.

Bobby, Kelsey, Iz and TK’s weekend of fun started with a road trip to Columbia, Missouri for the Missouri Texas game (which Missouri gets no love in my blog so outcome of the “game” is therefore considered nonexistent in my world).

TK lives in a little grandma’s house in Columbia. Immediately I was jealous of his high vaulted ceilings, bathrooms that didn’t have blue toilets and lovely sitting room complete with crocheted coasters and a plastic parrot for conversation. This pharmacist was clearly living the good life. Once we arrived, we decided to experience the famous town fare: Shakespeare’s pizza and Truman’s sports bar.

I can clearly be really bitchy when I haven’t eaten in a long time. Apparently, so is TK. There was what we thought was an open table at the bar, so we sat down. We did notice a empty pack of KOOL cigarettes (classy establishment) but figured those people have left. A nice, innocent, college aged waitress came over to inform us that the table was actually taken, and the patrons had simply stepped outside.

TK’s fluffy response?

“How is that my problem?”

And we finally solved the mystery of why TK doesn’t have a girlfriend.

So after a couple of drinks and goldschlager shots, we went back to casa de TK and consumed the world famous Shakespeare’s pizza.

Sorry Columbia, you should not brag about this place.  I’m no foodie, but I am a human and I’m here to tell you that the food there was not edible.  Half of us threw up. The other half had heart burn and indigestion.  Thus our big weekend of fun kickoff promptly ended at approximately 10:15 pm.

Until 4:00 am the next morning……………